Virtual Learning- Thoughts & Tips for Parents

 The title of the next I survived book should be...I survived Learning from Home 2020. 😅

No, but seriously...

We started back this school this week...virtually. Because we came from VA, which school year is Sept-midJune, combined with moving most of this summer, and COVID19 social distancing, it feels like we had virtually no summer. But here we are...

Here is our traditional first day of school pics...they seem happy, right?

I thought I would give some tips for virtual learning from a parent perspective (a separate blog post will be tips for teachers). But before we start, a disclaimer:

I don't have this together. 

Case in point: I was trying to set up Adeline's canvas account and there were about a billion and a half steps. And for the life of me, I could not get it to work- it kept saying invalid password. I thought maybe it was because she was new and it wasn't set up yet. So I email back and forth with her teacher and keep trying and finally, I'm like in a frustrated huff, Brent, I know you are working but I just need you to read these darn numbers to me. He obliges me because honestly, I can get pretty intense when I'm frustrated and he reads the password and then he looks at me and says, Just a quick question: is this for Edmund or Adeline?  I respond, Adeline! (Because honestly, aren't you listening to me!!!) and then I pause...Oh, yeah, Adeline was born in 2011, not 2013, Edmund was born in 2013. So total mom brain moment, I typed in the wrong year of birth, repeatedly and that was why the password wasn't working. AHH...anyway...

A couple of thoughts and tips of what I learned this first four days of virtual school...

1. Give yourself and your kids and their teachers lots of grace.

This is a new t-shirt I spoiled myself with and it's 100% true. 

It feels chaotic. It feels like everyone needs me and I can't help. The schedules and the zooms and the passwords...and just waiting for one of the kids to have a meltdown (because honestly, it is stressful for them too!). And I can't imagine how it would be if I was working fulltime on top of it like this spring. So, it's not going to look perfect and I have to realize that. Eventually we will find our rhythm and our routine. But it is going to be hard. And that is just the way it is. It's not ideal. But it still is necessary and real learning will still be happening. So try to let go off the small stuff and focus on the big picture. In the classroom, setting up routines and procedures take 2-4 weeks depending on the grade level...so is a smooth routine going to happen virtually in a week? No way!  

2. Set up a learning space but be flexible!

We have a sunroom in our house in Charlotte. It's a little hot during the day, but we made it into a family room/learning space. Each child has a desk/table to work, a place to keep supplies and their technology tools. Our school district sent a bag of materials for each child (Edmund's contains manipulatives for math and both children have workbooks for reading & math). Make sure you have a place to store materials. If you are short on space, a basket designated for each child could work. The school will ask you to purchase school supplies and they will need them- so make sure there is some organization with that (pencil pouches to store art supplies, etc). 

But remember, you can set up the perfect learning space, however, will my first grader sit at his desk to do zoom throughout the day? Sometimes he will, but other times, he has the computer on the couch and he is sitting on the floor. Or just sitting on the floor with a book to press on. In the classroom, we always have flexible seating options. We don't expect students to sit at their desk all day long. So for virtual learning, have a space for your kids, but allow them to float. Adeline was at her desk and at our dining room table as well. Keep in mind if you have multiple children learning, that two zooms going on will be distracting! Each of our kids has a set of earphones to plug in, which is helpful!

3. Be reasonable in expectations and focus on learning goals.

As much as I am not their teacher and they both have their own teachers, is it a reasonable expectation that neither of my student will need my support in their learning? Let's rephrase this, if it was a normal school year, would they need my support in their learning? Often times, yes, teachers would need me to reinforce something with them (usually done as homework after school). Can a first grade truly be independent with all of this? Part of what Edmund has done this week is working on writing letters and numbers. Even with teacher modeling, he has struggled with forming it correctly. I've had to take the pencil and move his hand with it to model how to form it. Obviously, his teacher can't do that virtually. So, I had to spend some time with him reinforcing so he could complete his assignment correctly. Even then, it wasn't pretty, but it is a learning experience. Adeline wanted me to sit next to her to help her with her assignments to understand them better. It got a little dicey going in between both of them and if I was working, I wouldn't have been able to do what I did this week.  Your student is going to need your support, but the level of support, can be flexible depending on learning goals. Focus on the big learning goals for the day/week and then reinforce as necessary, but don't sweat the small stuff. And if you are feeling overwhelmed about expectations and how your student is responding to virtual learning, then reach out to your child's teacher to help problem solve. We always say parent-teacher partnership is so important and this is tenfold in virtual learning environment! It is not all on you as the parent to make this work, but it can't be all on the teacher either. And instead of being frustrated and letting those emotions simmer, have an honest conversation with your child's teacher about what is working and what is not. He or she will understand the challenges, and work with you to problem solve. And they will be happy that you came to them instead of venting about it on a facebook group! :) 

4.  Work out an organizational system.

Organizing schedules is tricky. Until kids learn to navigate Canvas or their online learning platform, print out a schedule or write it on a sticky note each day so kids know when to go on zoom. I printed out a bunch of notes from their teachers. Eventually, I won't have to keep track of so much as the kids become more independent, but at first, you are going to want all the information the teachers sent you at your fingertips.

5. Be prepared for extra hungry children.

After every zoom, Edmund asks for a snack. And not just a couple pretzels...like a hefty snack. What is it about zoom chats that make the kids so voracious? I was woefully unprepared, but stock up on some fruit and healthier snacks to mix in that will be more filling. And he asked about lunch like non-stop... 

6. Know that technology woes will occur. 

NC schools crashed the internet on the first day! Oh boy... honestly, it's going to happen. Just try to be patient. 

7. Work towards rewards and eventually independence. 

Honestly, I am not above bribing my kids, especially in this crazy environment we are living in. They are mourning the loss of their traditional school year too. After the first day of school, Edmund and I made brownies to celebrate. He helped me and we spent that special time together. 

Both kids are also working towards small toys for having good weeks. Eventually, we will make the stakes a little higher to gear them towards more independence, especially with Adeline. Edmund's goals are just to participate at this point because that's where he is at right now. Eventually, I'd like both kids to be able to take the initiative of their schedules, but keep in mind, that is more realistic for upper elementary kids then primary babies.

8. Expect moments of struggle with behaviors.

Day 3- Edmund was refusing to get on zoom and Adeline had tears during a math pretest. I was hoping we would have more of a honeymoon period with school, but two days was what we got. There are good moments, and moments of struggle. I fully admit my kids aren't "easy", but from what I heard from other mom this spring, we were all having issues with our little ones. Expecting those moments, don't make them easier, but it does help put them in perspective. 

9.Know this is not normal and encourage children to persevere! 

Edmund's teacher had the class draw themselves on the first day of school. This was his picture. 

I asked him what was in his drawing- he had drawn a school and a car. He said, "this is for when we really go back to school and you drive me to school." And the kids were asking all sorts of questions- they were confused about the assignment, because to them, this is not normal! They wanted to draw themselves at school, not at home. And when need to know that eventually, there will be meltdowns and moments of struggle because it is so much harder for mom and dad to get them to do anything, than their teacher.  But we have to just continue to help them try to persevere through it. 

When everything was happening with Edmund this winter, I was constantly in contact with my Assistant Principal, who is also a mama. She listen to me, she problem solved with me, and was just a huge source of support for me. One thing that she told me is that she wanted me to remember that this is one moment in Edmund's life... and it was hard for me to see that in the midst of all the chaos, confusion and struggle. But she was right...and for our kids in this COVID19 time, this is one moment in their lives...but how we respond to that moment and what we teach them in that moment, has the potential to make a lasting impression. But also to remember, that this moment, will pass...and our kids will move on from this. 

And hopefully, God willing, next year's first day of school, will look much different than this year's. 

We can do this, parents! And teachers, we know that you will love on our kids, even from a distance. {I'm working on a blog post of tips for teachers from a parent perspective, so stay tuned!}